I was 19 yrs old stationed with 157 QM Unit Ft. Hood Texas. I needed a ride somewhere the next day. I asked a group of guys sitting at a picnic table that I knew. I said I would give gas money. One of them asked me to follow him, and we could talk about the details. I followed him to his barracks room. He tried to kiss me. I pulled away. He told me I was beautiful. He then choked me and threw me to the ground. As he was raping me from behind, I was yelling for help and yelling stop. It was so painful that I then began praying in my head for him not to kill me until he finished. It was painful. When it was over, he tried to hug me and told me not to tell anyone. I ran out of the room, past the guys at the picnic table to my room. I took a shower and cried. The next day I walked to the police station. I told them what happened and they called my First Sergeant. She called me to her office and said this was all my fault for going into his room. I also told the Commander, but nothing was done.
WASHINGTON (AP) — The Pentagon misled Congress by using inaccurate or vague information about sexual assault cases to blunt support for a Senate bill that would make a major change in how the military handles allegations of sexual misconduct, an Associated Press investigation found.
Internal government records that summarized the outcomes of dozens of cases portrayed civilian district attorneys and local police forces as less willing than senior military officers to punish sex offenders. The documents buttressed the Pentagon’s position that stripping commanders of their authority to decide which crimes go to trial — as the Senate legislation proposes — will mean fewer victims will get justice because there will be fewer prosecutions.
But in some the cases, the steps taken by civilian authorities were described incorrectly or omitted, according to AP research and interviews. Other case descriptions were too imprecise to be verified.
Anonymous, United States Army
I joined the military at 18 because my mother was sick. She died when I was 19yrs old in A.I.T. Two months later I was sent to Korea after being there a month I was raped by a top-ranking soldier. I was already devastated by the death of my mother this just pushed me over the edge. After trying to cope for a few weeks, I couldn’t so I took an overdose of Percocet. At the hospital, I found out I was pregnant with his child. I was horrified. I didn’t know what to do.
In the hospital, I informed my female Sargent, and she told me to keep quiet no one will believe me. She then told me to go off the post in Korea and find a abortions doctor. Abortion is illegal in Korea, and they wouldn’t allow me on a plane until I was 6 months. I had never felt so alone. I gave birth to her, and my family would not allow me to give her up.
She is now 13 and thriving I am a mental case and dying. Its hard enough seeing your attackers face every day, but even harder losing your life and having no help. They did DNA, and it was his. He pays a few dollars a month, but he still gets to live his life. The military refuses to acknowledge my assault. I suppose if it didn’t happen this child must be a ghost. I struggle every day to pay bills, to eat, to care for this child, I have no car, I’m a prisoner serving time. I need help. I was only 19yrs old, what about me??
Chad, United States Army
Shortly after switching from Reserve to Active Duty, I was stationed at Fort Bragg in North Carolina. My unit was sent to the field within days of my arrival. My first night in the field with my unit I was brutally hazed by a group of my peers.
As the assault ended and everyone disappeared into the woods, I stood up and started gathering my uniform and gear that had been stripped from my body. I suddenly felt myself being thrown to the ground again. My attacker mounted me and started acting like he was anally raping me. He then removed my undershorts and penetrated me with a small stick, causing permanent deformity to my body.
He kept repeating “You like that, don’t you faggot. Yeah, that’s right. I know what you are.” I was terrified. I knew that if I reported it I would face the risk of discharge because of my sexuality. I kept quiet.
My physical wound was painful, but I never sought treatment for fear of having to disclose what happened. My attacker was eventually assigned to be my team leader, then squad leader. He psychologically abused and bullied me for my remaining time at Fort Bragg. I lived in constant fear of being exposed. I still have frequent flashbacks and require a PTSD Service Dog.
Don’t be silent as I was. It will ruin your life. Get help, do not be ashamed, and know that it is NEVER your fault.
I am one of the lucky ones. I left for Basic Training at Lackland AFB in November a couple years back. I was older, 23 when I went, so already felt I had the leg up. I still try to put it behind me, act like it didn’t happen, so I can move on. No one Knows. I had the fortunate pleasure of having three training instructors. One day when I went into the dorm with just my wingman and me, while everyone else was in the chow hall, one of them was in there. Already nervous, he started yelling of course. Made my wing man stand in the first bay, While I was in the bathroom. You all know how long the bays are. My wing man was of course at the far end so he couldn’t hear me cry, at least that I know of. The T.I. Came in, I was at the sink, filling my canteen. He smiled. Asked If I was ok. Yes, sir. He put his hand on my neck. Rubbed it. What are you doing? It’s ok. There he goes hand down my pants. Get off me. He yanked them down. Crying already. Water everywhere. Something slimy. He prepared he brought lubrication. It was with him. It hurt badly. This is what you signed up for trainee sa*****.it was quick thank God. God can be merciful I guess. He left. I sat there washed up and left in a daze. M-wing man saw nothing and heard nothing I suppose. I got lucky. Real lucky. Went to the hospital the next day with a few excuses of not feeling well. Discharged out of B.A.S right there. I was stuck on med hold for a couple weeks, but I never had to see him again. Who’s going to believe that a male T.I? Raped a male anyway. I have never told anyone until now. YOU. This website. I feel a little bit of weight has been lifted off. Thank you.
I joined the U.S. Coast Guard October 31, 1983. After graduating boot camp, I was assigned to a small boat station in South Portland, Maine. It was there that I was brutally raped and told that if I told anyone that my face would be cut up with a knife.
The rape was reported and investigated. There was evidence. I was transferred to another duty station. Word spread, and I experienced harassment about proceeding forward with the case. The rapist was a Second Class Boatswains Mate (E-5). He was later discharged from the service.
I requested counseling and the counselor was a woman who blamed me for the rape. I will never forget her saying; “If women would just say yes there would be no rape.” I ended up holding all emotions in and continued with my service.
As time continued, I experienced headaches, body pains, and panic attacks. In 1991 I sought treatment from the rape crisis center in Miami, FL. I was having difficulty with flashbacks and panic attacks. It was there that I was told that I had Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) delayed-onset. I received care through a civilian therapist.
I had to fight for my medical care and went through 2 medical boards and won both. I transferred to New York in October of 1993. The Coast Guard made healing and recovery difficult.
I went to a National Organization for Women meeting in NYC and listened to a speaker discuss (PTSD). I later went to her for therapy. In 1995 I had an increase in symptoms and realized that if I were to heal, I needed to move on and leave the service. I received a disability retirement in January of 1996. I tried to serve 20 years, but my physical body was worn from the trauma inflicted upon me.
After reporting the first rape and experiencing the after effects of reporting, I decided that I would never report a rape again.
Anonymous, United States Navy
It took a lot of courage to come forward and report I had been sexually assaulted by my army supervisor (e-7) and his Afghan colleague who both worked for the 3star Army command general.
I thought there would be an investigation and that I would be allowed to continue doing my job, especially with other women in my same shop coming forward and reporting similar actions from the same supervisor around the same time as me. I turned down his advances, and he said, “that’s okay because even if you’re not into me, I have an associate who is also interested in you for sex.” But my words fell on deaf ears when my supervisor once again cornered and attacked me at work.
I did not make it back to my barracks room the same night without being forcibly raped by his associate, and one of the guys at the next base they moved me to joked in front of my new co-workers (my third day thereafter my navy e-9 called ahead and warned the new command I had been raped and was somehow now “their problem” to be “dealt with”) that he would be the next to rape me (after I learned I would have to do detainee ops and sort through decapitated body parts instead of my job as an IT as punishment for coming forward while the three-star covered up the investigation because it was an election year and spearheaded 3 years of retaliation and mistreatment that cost me my career and barred me from getting accurate, ethical medical care, especially after I reported HIPAA violation at the next place I was transferred). Being assaulted was bad enough.
I did not officially enter hell until I spoke up about it and the military commands did everything in their power to distract me, discredit me, demoralize me, and destroy my once promising career as they railroaded me out of the service for political reasons.